Single because I choose to be

October 2015 · 4 minute read

I’m starting to get kind of sick of unwanted attention due to the fact that I’m single and must therefore be really upset about it or looking to get laid. If I meet a guy who I get along with and can have a conversation with, why can’t we just be friends? Why does it need to be anything else? Maybe it’s you who is upset about your relationship status and looking to get some.

Now, I know that this is not what every guy is thinking and I also know that I’m that good looking so don’t worry, I’m not deluded. Actually, maybe I am deluded. I guess you’d think that by the time you’ve been around the block a few times at the ripe young age of 27, you would think that you could kind of see what situations you’re getting yourself into before they happen. Apparently that’s not actually true.  I still find myself on the occasion getting wound up into a situation that I had no intention of getting into and if someone had have told me earlier that this was going to happen I would have (hopefully) somehow avoided it. I guess thats the other problem, when I try to avoid certain situations with people I’ve just met I end up coming across very cold, when again that’s not the intention. So what do you do? I’ve kind of come to the conclusion that there’s just no winning and I cannot be friends with dudes, unless I already know them or they have girlfriends. But even then, their girlfriend’s get the wrong idea. Arrg.

So, the point is that I’m happily single. I’m not trying to get laid (if I want that then I will make a point of making it happen, thank you). I don’t have time for a boyfriend. I’m not trying to steal anyone’s boyfriend. And I’m happy about all of it.

Comments like “That’s why you’re single…” and “Are you going to be one of those women has kids when they’re like 40?” are the best. Especially when they come from your family.

What I think people need to realise is that different people have different aspirations, different goals, different motivations. Some people are old fashioned and just want to have kids, a house and be married. Life accomplished. Sure, one day do want to have kids, but that’s not today. I not only want but also need to live my life first, I’m not ready to settle down, I don’t feel like I’ve experienced the world enough. And if I have kids now, my career is never going to take off. Ha, notice how I didn’t mention a relationship.

It’s great that people are concerned about me being sad and alone but I can assure the world that I most definitely am not. It’s not like I don’t get offers but to be perfectly honest, I am single by choice and quite happy about it. I’ve been in relationships before. They didn’t work out. I’ve got too many things going on right now to be distracted by having a relationship, particularly if it ends up being a dramatic one. I’m on a mission right now and getting married or having kids are not the mission, therefore I don’t need to actively seek out a relationship. Thanks. More to the point, I do not feel like I’m missing out, in fact I feel more fulfilled with what I’m able to accomplish in all the extra time.

Of course if the right guy comes along, I may have even already met him, and things work then sweet. I’m not opposed to the idea. That guy just has to fit in with what I want and that’s all there is to it. Since my standards are unbelievably high for myself, you can only imagine what they’re like for others. And of course based on a history of finding out what kind of people I don’t want to be with, well, unfortunately that kind of just made things more difficult for anyone in the future too.